Home
When we look with our eyes
We see only sculptures, crafted for us
We do not see beneath the portraits
The souls that wage war
Beneath imitating paint
We do not witness the wars being waged
They make no sound
They leave no mark
No rivers of red
I have waged war with breaths
That felt like drowning
Opened eyes to mornings
With an effort like heaving stones
I learned how to smile
With a mouth full of coals
How to laugh with a chest
Engulfed with ash
My hardest battles
Weren’t fought with the world
They were fought in the dark
In silence
In secret
They were fought against pain,
against lack,
against loss.
They were fought against the silhouetted figure
Who knew the name of my heart
And only used it
To hurt me
To survive in the world
Receives applause and praise
To survive yourself
Is to trudge a road
Surrounded by silence
Fogged in mist
Further into the darkness
Every step a negotiation
A barter, a compromise,
A, one last time
Seeking reprieve in dream
Praying for a ceasefire
Knowing it would only last till morning
To once again find myself
Back on the road
Oblivion bides
At the edge of awareness
A small price to pay
When shrouded in shame
But I know what it cost to stay
I know the price
of choosing life
again and again
without applause
without witness
without hope
But when the mist lifts
And light illuminates your surrounds
You discover a home
Where gentleness lives,
where magic abides.
A home that sees not with eyes
A home that peers deeper
A home that sees with its heart,
With love
This home sees the way you listen,
the way you stay,
the way you make space
for others to breathe.
This home is yours
Your soul is the key,
the door will never be locked.
Return,
Home.


‘The way you make space… for others to breathe’. I resonate with that. Beautifully spoken.
‘Every step a negotiation.’ Such powerful words. So beautifully written.